


Booty Call

by anne_ammons



Series: Drabbles for Fairest of the Rare - Lovefest 2020 [9]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Booty Calls, F/M, Humor, Muggle Technology, Texting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-21
Updated: 2020-02-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 21:28:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22832557
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anne_ammons/pseuds/anne_ammons
Relationships: Hermione Granger/Theodore Nott
Series: Drabbles for Fairest of the Rare - Lovefest 2020 [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1633945
Comments: 12
Kudos: 40
Collections: Love Fest 2020





	Booty Call

**Author's Note:**

  * For [LadyKenz347](https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyKenz347/gifts).



H: Hey

T: Sup

H: ???

T: Hello 💗

H: I’m leaving the office soon.

T: I’m at the Leaky. You should come by.

H: Not sure. It’s been a long day. I’m a little tired.

T: Blaise and Draco would love to say hello.

H: Ha! Then I’m definitely not stopping by.

I don’t have the energy to deal with them.

H: Was wondering if you might want to come over?

T: Oh? What exactly did you have in mind, Princess?

H: Do I need to spell it out?

T: Humor me. I’m a simple man.

H: Yeah, right. You’re anything but simple.

T: Potato, potah-to.

T: Compared to my poncy friends I definitely am.

H: Can’t argue with that. You know my feelings on Draco.

T: I thought he had grown on you?

H: You've grown on me. I tolerate him.

T: 😢

T: He likes you.

H: 😒

H: Are you coming over? Or are we dissecting

my thoughts on the company you keep?

T: Ah yes… you were going to tell me why you

have requested my presence at such a late hour.

H: Are you trying to be funny?

T: Am I being funny?

H: 😐

T: I tell you what, let’s play a game…

T: When I get there, I’ll do exactly what you tell me to.

So, be specific and don’t leave anything out.

H: Interesting. I’ll bite.

T: You will? I’m already intrigued.

H: You knock and I open the door. You come inside and kiss me.

H: And then…

T: Yes??

H: You head to the kitchen and do all the dishes,

scrub down the counters and sweep the floors. The muggle way.

H: Shall I go on?

T: 🤦🏻

T: You’re no good at this game.

H: I think it’s brilliant.

T: Suddenly, I think I may be too tired to come over.

H: Aww… don’t be like that.

T: If it’s not worth my while…

H: You know it’ll be worth your while.

T: ⏱

H: Okay… okay

H: You knock on the door, I open it, dressed in a t-shirt.

T: A t-shirt?

H: Your Slytherin tee 🐍

T: Oh… nice

T: That’s all?

H: You want me to have more clothes on??

T: No, no. Just trying to make sure

I’ve got the right image.

H: Well then, let’s say that’s all you can see. 😉

T: Go on…

H: I grab you by the belt, drag you inside

and lead you over to the sofa.

H: Where I push you down and then climb on your lap.

H: You put your hands on me and pull me

towards you so I can feel just how excited you are to see me.

T: I may be excited already, Princess.

H: And then you proceed to kiss me,

like you’ve just crossed the desert

and I’m an oasis you’ve just stumbled upon.

T: Thirsty, I’m so thirsty.

H: I grind against you until you decide

to flip us over and lay me down on the couch.

T: Wouldn’t the bed be more comfortable?

H: I’m sure we’ll get there later.

T: You saucy minx.

H: And then you notice the green satin knickers I have on.

T: Oh yessss

H: And you carefully work them down my legs.

T: I think I’d prefer to rip them off.

H: NO, YOU WOULD NOT

H: Because you would rather see them again.

T: Love, I’ll buy you more knickers.

H: Eww… that sounds like something Draco would say.

T: 🤨

T: Okay… I slide them from under you. And then what?

T: Yes?

T: Hermione??

T: ????

H: YOU TOSSERS

H: WHY DOES IT LOOK LIKE I’VE BEEN TEXTING HERMIONE

FOR THE LAST 15 MINUTES WHEN I’VE BEEN WAITING AT HER PLACE?

H: YOU HAVE EXACTLY ONE MINUTE TO EXPLAIN YOURSELVES

BEFORE I LET HER COME HEX YOU WITHIN AN INCH OF YOUR LIVES

T: Theo??

T: Uh…you left your phone on the table?

T: We were just warming her up for you?

H: I’M GOING TO KILL YOU BOTH,

IF SHE DOESN’T GET TO YOU FIRST

T: Yeah, yeah. We know it won’t be tonight.

You’ve got plans.

H: JUST ATTACH MY PHONE TO A FUCKING OWL ALREADY

T: See, that’s the problem with these new fangled devices.

Although, I can better see their usefulness now.

Much faster than sending notes by parchment.

H: Yeah, and you can send photos, too. 😉

T: Oh?

T: Oh!!

H: The benefits of dating a Muggle-born. Night, fuckers.


End file.
